Xmas Jokes

Nic: I'll raise 20.
Me: Huh OMG $20? Then I think I'll fold.
Everyone at the poker table starts laughing before I stupidly realise he meant 20 cents.

******

A: Training damn tough. I have to carry the matador (some weapon) myself leh!
Me: WAH!!!! You so strong! :3 *rains praises on him*
For the longest time, I thought that matador was actually a metal-door. So I was really impressed when Anthony told me about how he'd carried it by himself and walked long distances with it. Just imagine the jokes that ensued when I finally found out what it was, and confessed that all along I've been picturing my boy carrying a huge metal door like some weightlifting champion.

******

Me: Let's list 25 things we like about each other on Christmas, just like what Z & N did!
A: Hmm okay. You start first?
Me: I like you because......... you don't smoke!
A: Ooooh ok. I like you because........ *long pause* you don't smoke too! Haha!!!
Me: NOOOOOOOOOOOO! YOU CANNOT CHEAT! HOW CAN COPY ONE. NOT FAIR! Restart ah. This time you start first.
A: I like you because... you're very creative.
Me: AH! Teehee. And I like you because your art is velly gootz!
A: @*^#(&#*@&*^@#*!!! You still say cannot copy. You just rephrased me only.

Disclaimer: This (bimbotic phase) too shall pass.